Deep Inside The Mansion
by ViolettaSushi
Summary: Just some random stories about the mansion, nothing much!
Adventures in Smash Mansion

Disclaimer: I own nothing, this is all Nintendo's work. I don't even own this laptop, it used to be my sister's.

"WAHAHAHA!"

Everybody in the Smash Mansion had a rough wake-up call, for Wario, the naughty fatso, was riding his motorbike at top speed through the 2nd floor. At 6 am.

Of course, there was a lot of screaming, crashing and the usual havoc.

"Wario, get your fat ass over here and lemme beat you up!" screamed Marth.

"Wario, you stupid fatty! You wrecked my dresses...you'll pay for that, dearly..." mumbled Peach.

"AAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" Toon Link ran frantically around the Mansion, trying not to get run over by Wario and his bike.

The only person in bed was Shulk.

About two hours later of cleaning up, there were a lot of punching and kicking sounds coming from the free room. It seems nearly everyone was beating up Wario, with the exceptions being Toon Link, Rosalina and Ike. Toon Link was lying spread out on the floor, unconscious from the shock, Rosalina was trying to calm her Luma down, and Ike was kneeling on the carpet, sobbing at the sight of his squashed sandwiches.

"No...no! My sandwiches...my precious sandwiches! Cedric, Rebecca...come back to meeee!" Ike cried out to pieces of bread and lettuce.

"Oh, Luma! I am sorry, don't cry! It's ok..." Rosalina was having a hard time calming her Luma down, who was spazzing out with mixed emotions.

And as for Toon Link...well, he didn't make a single sound.

The rest of the day went bad. It was raining outside, so the Smashers were either stuck inside watching telly or glaring at Wario. Nothing good was on TV, only some trashy Eastenders or static. Ganondorf was spending his day in his room, having a great time with some Blu-Tack and his diary. He'd already written 50 pages about his home and old life, and made a 'marvellous' replica of the London Eye with his Blu-Tack. He'd also written a secret apology letter to Link, but never showed it in public.

Around evening, Toon Link finally woke up. There were about 23 dark shadows around him, and they were all praising a jar of Chuchu jam, and they were going to force him to eat the grape flavour and everything was turning pink and-

"Hey Toon, you're up."

Ness was right in his face, staring at him.

"You know, you were out cold for a while, about five to six hours or so. I just decided to leave you there, ok? I know what you're like when you're disturbed in your sleep, so..."

Toon Link got up to see a drunk-looking Captain Falcon and Snake cooking Falco in the oven.

"Hey, hey Snake... I can't wait for dinner tonight. How's the chicken going, buddy?

The drunk pair were both ignoring the screams of fear coming from the oven, and there was now a large crowd gathering around it. Of course, the Smashers hated harming each other, so Samus and Zelda kicked their way to the front and pulled out the traumatised Falco. The two girls then punched the drunk men in the faces, and walked away as if nothing had happened. The day was getting worse by the minute...

Back in the living room, Marth, Ike and Lucas were staring at the telly, which had been tuned onto static. Ike was still sniffling at his plate of 'sandwiches', and Marth was whining at Lucas to pass him the remote.

"Marth, there's nothing on apart from Eastenders and static, so why bother? I thought you hated soaps anyway..."

"Lucas...can't we watch a DVD, then?" moaned Marth.

"Marth, the only DVD we have rented is 'Life in Zambia', that documentary that made Peach cry to bits because of those giraffes. Besides, that's way past its due date. Wasn't it supposed to be handed in 5 years ago?"

That made Marth a little unnerved. No wonder that young woman at the video rental shop glared at him all the time.

Now, back to Ganondorf. He seemed to have made many different sculptures out of Blu-Tack, including the Temple of Time, Nabooru, and for some strange reason, Ealing Town Hall. The King of Evil was rather impressed by his 'artwork', and took a few pictures of them on his phone. He was so proud of his sculptures, that he ended up forcing Master Hand to put them on his office shelf. In reality, they just looked like blobs.

Back in their room, Villager and Mega Man were arguing about which hot sauce was better.

"Like I said, I trust Tony's more because that stuff's the best!"

"No, Vil. You're completely wrong, you know. Dude, everybody here uses Dandelion Chilli Sauce, because it's SOOO much better than that 'Tony' crap." The two wrestled on the floor with each other, not getting tired at all. See, this is the sorta stuff that happens here at Smash Mansion. You do not wanna live here. Anyway, back to the story!

Suddenly, Villager had a brilliant, great idea! It was a masterpiece! He would conquer everything with a plan of this wit!

"You dare to argue with me, ROCK?" sneered Villager.

Villager brandished his gold axe and grinned an evil grin. Mega Man started to sweat and decided not to argue. It was really the safer choice, anyway.

"N-No, I don't..." mumbled Rock.

"Good, so then it's settled! Repeat after me, Rock. 'Tony's hot sauce is the best.'" beamed Villager.

"Uh...Tony's hot sauce is the best?"

With a wide smile on his face, Villager walked out the room and quietly shut the door to their room.

"Link! Link! Hey! Listen! Why didn't you tell me that Eastenders was on just now?! That soap is my life!"

It's not every day you see a blue fairy with an obsession for a rubbish soap opera.

Link, dreading for this moment to come, dashed into the kitchen and slammed Navi into a bottle, where she truly belongs.

Now, Navi's bellowing couldn't be heard. Ah, peace and quiet at last... or not.


End file.
